[Imc-uk-features] feature proposal (George Fox 6: Campus Activism at the Crossroads)
ionnek at aktivix.org
Wed Sep 21 02:40:30 PDT 2005
good feature! if you want to know "my" criteria - lots of links,
background to the story in the body, local event with wider implications...
The only thing i would change is to move the first paragraph of the
abstract into the body of the mail. I mean the paragraph about the
problems of academia. I think a feature abstract should generally start
with the concrete what happened, when, where etc (the trial), so that
the reader can see immediately what's new, then decide if she wants to
move on to more background, ideology, analysis.
The second paragraph implicitely raises all the things you mention in
the first paragraph - the lack of funding, the corporate presence, the
threat to dissenters. And phunkees photo-job speaks a clear language,
too. Maybe, if it is very important to you, you could just keep the last
sentence of the first paragraph in the abstract?
Students who object to the corporate raids on their campuses can expect to see themselves
facing harsh measures, including criminal prosecutions
Please don't read this as "you must change this" - i'm just trying to
revive the tradition of discussing features in detail.
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